Best/Worst Breakup Advice from 40 People
Samantha Jayne, Relationship Expert says, “At the end of the day, COVID really showed us the truth; strong couples stayed together, the weaker ones with the cracks ended due to many factors.”
If you are one of the brokenhearted, you may be looking for some pearls of wisdom in the form of breakup advice. It’s more likely a lot of people have the advice to give you whether you want it or not.
Since you are here we will assume you’re at least curious about what 40 people have to say about the very best and the very worst breakup advice.
We promise a few chuckles along the way and look forward to hearing back from you about which category you’d put some of this advice into.
The Worst Advice
It’s not that your friends or family are aiming to give you bad advice. The main source of bad breakup advice is that it’s actually relationship advice and you’re not in a relationship after a breakup.
- “You’ve gotta talk to her, man! Don’t let her go if you love her!”
- This is a great illustration of how your ex will more than likely interpret your “just friendly” text or email:
- “Listen- sleep with him again if you absolutely must but don’t remarry him. He was too hard to get rid of.”
- "The surest way to be alone is to get married." – Gloria Steinem
- If there’s some alcohol involved, you’re sure to get this advice: “Warn his new girlfriend!”
- Another huge DON’T, “Make him jealous by sleeping with his best friend.” Nope, no, definitely not good advice.
- “Never give up on something that you can’t go a day without thinking about.” This may be the worst breakup advice you can get. Basically, you’re being told to become a stalker and that’s a felony in most states.
- “Talk to her parents and friends.” That’s third-party, unwanted contact. You are hurting from a breakup. My advice is to not end up with a restraining order as well.
- “The next time that he cheats, you know it won’t be on me.” — Carrie Underwood
Oh, Carrie, love your voice, envy your legs, but your breakup moves are ugly!
“I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped-up four-wheel drive, carved my name into his leather seats” - To say “I love you, but….” is to say, “I did not love you at all”. ― Jamie Weise
- “We must be willing to let go of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” – Joseph Campbell
- “You can never go from going out to being friends, just like that. It's a lie. It's just something that people say they'll do to take the permanence out of a breakup. And someone always takes it to mean more than it does, and then is hurt even more when, inevitably, said ‘friendly' relationship is still a major step down from the previous relationship, and it's like breaking up all over again. But messier.” ― Sarah Dessen, This Lullaby
- “Don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.” – Dr. Seuss
- "I guess the only way to stop divorce is to stop marriage." – Socrates
- "Hate is such a luxurious emotion, it can only be spent on one we love." – Bob Udkoff
- “When you experience loss, people say you’ll move through the 5 stages of grief…. Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance….. What they don’t tell you is that you’ll cycle through them all every day.” ― Ranata Suzuki
- Dua Lipa gives such great advice to a really fun beat so play it loud on repeat!
- “Give yourself permission to say ‘This isn’t serving me’ and walk away.”
- “The only whole heart is a broken one because it lets the light in.” ― David Wolpe
- “You can’t even be mad at him, because this is who he was. This was who he’d always been. He’d never lied about that.”
- “I cannot compromise my respect for your love. You can keep your love, I will keep my respect.” ― Amit Kalantri
- “You’ll know when you are ready, when you feel better, your days are clearer and you start to smile again, feel happy, your story about the break up doesn’t sound emotional anymore but more about an opportunity to grow. You’ve got through feeling lonely and you don’t care if you meet someone or not, it’s more a bonus because you know when you meet them they will be amazing. They won’t fill a void. Instead, they will complete you and you’ll be a team.” - Samantha Jayne
- “I planned my whole future around Adam,' she said now, quietly. 'And now I have nothing.' 'No,' I told her, 'now you just don't have Adam. There's a big difference, you just can't see it yet.” ― Sarah Dessen
- “I will not try to convince you to love me, to respect me, to commit to me. I deserve better than that; I AM BETTER THAN THAT...Goodbye.” ― Steve Maraboli
- “Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
Even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'mma be ok” ― Leona Lewis - “I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken, and I’d rather remember it as it was at its best, than mend it and see the broken pieces as long as I lived.” – Margaret Mitchell
- “Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.” – Marilyn Monroe
- “The best revenge is massive success.” – Frank Sinatra
- Licensed marriage and family therapist Katherine Parker’s advice is to wait at least one to three months before getting back in touch with your ex, if that’s something you’re interested in at all, “This gives you time to focus on yourself, she says. It can also help you avoid falling into a harmful pattern of offering emotional support to your ex-partner and prolonging the break up.”
- “To be rejected by someone doesn't mean you should also reject yourself or that you should think of yourself as a lesser person. Remember that only ONE person has rejected you at the moment, and it only hurts so much because to you, that person's opinion symbolized the opinion of the whole world.” ― Jocelyn Soriano
- “It is our wounds that create in us a desire to reach for miracles. The fulfillment of such miracles depends on whether we let our wounds pull us down or lift us up towards our dreams.” ― Jocelyn Soriano
- “Hold on to the thought that no emotion lasts forever, no matter how wonderful or how terrible the emotion may be. The tears may last a little longer than you would like, but it will get better. I promise.” ― Osayi Osar-Emokpae
- "Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience." — Victoria Holt
- “She was an open book.
He was illiterate” – Maya Angelou - “Like some wines our love could neither mature nor travel.” ― Graham Greene
- When he says, “You’ll never find another one like me.” just tell him, “That’s the point.”
- “Stuart needs "space" and "time," as if this were physics and not a human relationship.” ― Kathryn Stockett
- “Why don’t you just pretend that the asshole dropped dead? You can’t call or write to a dead man. Put a couple of candles in front of his picture, say a few Hail Marys, and get it over with.” ― Isabel Lopez
- “When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.” – Barney Stinson
- “Talk to yourself like you would talk to a friend or younger sibling. Love yourself this same way.”
That one is fun to think about for a hot minute but if it falls under stalking, vandalism or other criminal activity repeat with me “Prison orange is not my color, prison orange is not my color.”
The Sad, But True
Time to Shift Gears: The “Best”
We now arrive at some of the best breakup advice these folks have to share and, as Charlotte Eriksson stated, “There is no right way to do this.”
If you inwardly moan every time someone tells you to get lots of exercise to recover from a breakup (and the main reason you’re moaning is that you know they’re right you just don’t feel like it) then get back to both physical and emotional fitness by combining an exercise with exercise.
Dating and Relationship Guru Carlos Cavallo explains “One of the best exercises is simply to walk. And you can couple this with imagining yourself walking away from that ex of yours. It's great motivation, and it's a great movement for your body.”
Beware of people who absolutely insist their advice is the right way, the only way, or the best way because at the end of the day only you can decide what will make you happy and whole again.
“Don’t pick up the phone
You know he’s only callin’ cause he’s drunk and alone
Don’t let him in
You’ll have to kick him out again
Don’t be his friend
You know you’re gonna’ wake up in his bed in the morning
And if you’re under him, you ain’t gettin’ over him”
When you’re having a really bad day remember, so far you’ve survived 100% of your worst days so you’re doing great!
The Funny Good
Remember Your Own Best Advice
It’s easy to forget our expectations, and have some solemn feelings towards the end of a split- but don’t worry, we’ve all been there and we’re still kicking! Remember you’re wiser than you think, and to follow your gut. If you find your friends are always coming to you for advice, apply this knowledge to yourself. You can do it!
I’d love it if you’d share some of the breakup advice you’ve given or received and say where it ranks on the scale of best to worst in the comments, below.
And if you think someone else needs to hear this today, please share!
