Breakup

How Long Should It Really Take To Get Over A Breakup?

How Long Should It Really Take To Get Over A Breakup?

Getting over a breakup is a tricky process. 

Even though it can feel like the pain will never end, it’s critical to remember that you will get over the heartbreak in time.

Are you dealing with a hard breakup? Does it feel like the hurt will never end? Let’s talk about the timeline you can expect when working to get over a relationship, whether short-term or long-term.

Few things hurt more than a breakup. After the matter, it can feel like the pain will last for eternity, and everyone has a different opinion on your hurt. How long should it really take to get over a breakup? We'll talk about the answer to this question next so you can feel confident that the hurt won't last forever.

The Reality of Dealing With a Breakup

The Reality of Dealing With a Breakup

The reality of the situation is that there is no set timeline for getting over a breakup. You may have heard ninety days as the standard, but who’s to say? Some stand behind two years as their limit, while other people think you should be over your ex in a matter of months. Everyone has a different opinion on how long it takes to get over a breakup.

When dealing with a breakup, you need to know that you will experience:

  • Difficult feelings: You might experience sadness, anger, and even spontaneous moments of joy as you learn to be yourself again.
  • Vulnerable moments: You will find yourself wildly vulnerable at moments in your life, unable to deal with what’s in front of you.
  • Grieving: You will go through all the stages of grief - denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
  • Significant loss: You will feel as though you’ve lost a major part of your life if you were close to your former partner.

These are all normal with a breakup.

Most studies note that it takes about three weeks for you to start feeling better after a breakup, though this is certainly not the final moment of recovery. After about a month, you should begin to feel slightly less heavy.

Still, it’s critical to remember that every breakup is different. There are varying factors that come into play with each relationship. Some have more baggage than others, and some splits are full of wild emotional turbulence. At the end of the day, you have to take everything at your own pace and be kind to yourself.

What Causes Breakup Recovery Time to Vary?

Many factors impact the time it can take to get over a breakup. Every situation is different, and only you can know the details of your intimate life. We can’t talk about your specific situation; however, we can go over some of the factors that cause breakup times to vary from person to person.

A few of the things that can affect how long it takes to deal with a breakup include:

  • Who left who: Did you leave them, or did they leave you? It can take longer to get over a split if you were the one who was left behind.
  • Infidelity: If infidelity was the cause of the breakup, it can leave you feeling confused and insecure about your standing in the world.
  • Length of the relationship: The longer your relationship was, the more painful it will be to find your footing after it’s over.
  • Feelings involved: Sometimes, you’re more involved with a relationship than the other person is. If you’re attached and they’re not at the same level, it can take longer to deal with the breakup.

You might find your split easier or more difficult to deal with depending on these circumstances.

Distress is natural with any separation, whether you’re the person breaking up or the person being broken up with. These factors can increase or decrease the time that the trauma sticks with you.

If you’re trying to figure out how long it should take you to get over the split, consider the factors that went into your breakup. These can give you a path to recovery and help you set expectations for the road ahead.

Strategies for Dealing With Breakups

Strategies for Dealing With Breakups

Many factors can influence how long it takes to deal with a breakup. On the flip side, there are also a few strategies you can use to help push through your breakup faster. You can incorporate each of these into your life slowly. Don’t push yourself past your comfort zone as you work with this new heartache.

Here are a few strategies that can help you get past a breakup faster:

  1. Talk about it: Talk about your feelings with friends or family regularly. You’ll feel much better if you get everything out in the open, rather than keeping it bottled up inside.
  2. Stay busy: Keep yourself moving with activities, routines, and hobbies. Try something new to keep your mind occupied.
  3. Give yourself space: Take some time for YOU and give yourself room to deal with this new feeling. Balance alone time with moments spent hanging out with people you love.
  4. Avoid addictions: Stay away from addictions like alcohol and sugar. It’s easy to fall into addictive behavior after heartbreak - this choice will hinder your growth.
  5. Take care of yourself: Take care of yourself to push on. Exercise regularly and eat healthy as often as you can.

These can help you cope and move forward with your life faster.

Of course, it’s vital to note that these strategies can be helpful, but they’re not foolproof. You can avoid addictions, stay busy, and talk about your feelings, but the heartbreak might still creep in even with these additions to your life.

Heartbreak is one of the most powerful feelings out there. It’s no wonder there are so many songs and movies that deal with the agony of splitting up. There’s only so much you can do to speed up the process. It’s one big waiting game.

Signs You're Getting Over the Breakup

Signs You're Getting Over the Breakup

We’ve talked about the timeline of a breakup and how you can deal with your heartbreak, but how do you know if you’re getting better? There are a few telltale signs you can search for to help determine if you’re getting over a breakup. Just like the timeline, these are different for everyone.

Here’s a few things that could indicate you’re getting over your breakup:

1.You’re avoiding social media: You’ve stopped stalking their social media for updates on their life and focused back on your life.

2.You know your role in the breakup: You don’t deny your position, whether it was your fault or partially your fault. You accept what happened and are ready to push forward.

3.You’ve stopped talking about it: You don’t bring up your breakup every chance you get. You can talk about other topics without bringing attention back to your heartbreak.

4.You want to date again: You’re ready to put yourself out there and start dating again. You want to explore the dating pool and take a stab at love again.

5.You know what you learned: You know what the relationship brought to your life and what you learned from it. You’ve accepted it as a part of your life.

These can indicate that you’re starting to get over your breakup.

Anything positive is an excellent indicator that your brain is adjusting to this new version of life. Embrace those changes to help get over your breakup.

If you notice you’re healing, keep doing what you’re doing. You’ll notice that the end of the breakup recovery process feels very different from the early stages. At this point, you’ll see the light at the end of the tunnel. Food regains taste, activities seem fun, and you’ll find yourself ready to dive into love again. There’s a light at the end of the tunnel!

Forget About a Timeline

Forget About a Timeline

Getting over a breakup becomes easier when you throw the rules out the window. You might feel better one day and then feel worse the next. Something could trigger you and start an emotional rollercoaster again, it happens. It may only take a few weeks to feel like you’re ready to move on, or it could take a few years. Whatever your timeline is, recovery will happen in time. Don’t pressure yourself to heal!

Final Thoughts

Although there are many opinions about the timeline for breakup recovery, there is no set speed for dealing with pain. It could take one week or five years - the critical thing is that you care for yourself. Do you have any breakup advice? We'd love to hear from you in the comments below!