Breakup

How to Practice Self-Love During a Breakup

How to Practice Self-Love During a Breakup

How to Practice Self-Love During a Breakup

Breakups are hard, but it’s vital to stay strong and give yourself the love you deserve. Allow yourself to feel all the emotions, be healthy, and keep distracted to practice self-love.

Breakups are terrible. There's no way around it, no matter who you are. If you've undergone a split, you know how easy it is to feel like the world is on your shoulders, crushing you. Even in this terrible time, it's critical for you to know you're still worthy of self-love. 

To practice loving yourself, there are a few things you should understand. You must:

  • Allow yourself to feel whatever you feel.
  • Recognize it’s not all your fault.
  • Indulge in what you love, or try something new.
  • Stay healthy, both mentally and physically.
  • Distract yourself with friends.
  • Know that the process is not easy, no matter who you are.
  • Find a way to make a positive out of a negative.

Try these to get yourself in the right mindset for recovery and help you move forward.

Let’s dive into each of these strategies so you can give yourself the kindness you deserve. Breakups are hard, but you WILL emerge victorious on the other side. We know it!

Allow Yourself To Feel Whatever You Feel

1. Allow Yourself to Feel Whatever You Feel

Unsplash, Anthony Tran

The first thing to know is that strong feelings are inevitable during a breakup. During this hard time, it’s easy to push them to the side, ignore them, and deal with them later. But, the best thing you can do to practice self-love is to feel whatever you want to feel, whenever you feel it, no matter what time of day it is.

Let it all out! Your mental health will thank you as you gather your courage to push through this loss, and you’ll have better coping skills for the future.

If you want to cry, cry. If you want to yell into a pillow, do it. Once it’s over, you can move on. Yet, if the crying or anger goes on for weeks at a time, you should seek out professional help. A therapist can help you determine why your feelings are lingering for so long, and what you can do about it. 

Recognize It’s Not All Your Fault

2. Recognize It’s Not All Your Fault

Unsplash, Korney Violin

It’s easy to feel like everything is your fault during a breakup. What could you have done differently? What could you have said instead to avoid the breakup? These are some of the questions that flash through someone’s mind during heartbreak. They’re perfectly valid, but it’s critical to keep one thing in mind while you think about them…

Breakups involve TWO people. No matter what your mind might say to you, it’s a two-person deal. One of the best ways to love yourself is to remember that this ordeal is not just your fault. You’re an adult, your partner is an adult, and you both came to the conclusion that you weren’t right for each other.

If you’re struggling to find closure, you can always talk to the other person about the situation. It’s important to note that this isn’t for everyone. If you feel like you had a healthy breakup and talking to them will help you cope, go for it. This action can help you understand why what happened, happened.

Indulge In What You Love

3. Indulge in What You Love

Unsplash, Taylor Wright

Sometimes, the best thing you can do for yourself during a breakup is to indulge in doing the things you love. Pick up an old activity that you used to do before you got together, and have fun. Doing what you love can help you forget about the situation and spark a new confidence for the rest of your life.

You can also try new things! Some of the activities you could take on in your life include:

  • Teaching yourself a new crafting technique, like quilting or knitting
  • Writing to keep track of your feelings or creating a fictitious storyworld
  • Forming a new playlist full of upbeat music to listen to as you move forward

These activities are fun and will help you grow from the situation, keeping you moving in a positive upswing.

Many people can attest to the power of doing something you love. Whether you revisit an old adventure or try a new thing, having fun is a way to practice self-love in this tough time. Let yourself go for a little while! You never know what you could find out about yourself along the way.

Stay Healthy

4. Stay Healthy

Unsplash, Jonathan Borba

It’s easy to let yourself go during a breakup. Negative feelings can spring to life and knock you on your back faster than you can blink. One of the best ways to practice self-love is to stay healthy both physically and mentally. It will keep you fit and induce a happier mindset, setting you on course for the rest of your life.

Some things you can do to take care of your health include:

  • Committing to working out for at least a few minutes a day
  • Ensuring you eat the right foods, like fruits and veggies
  • Creating a daily routine
  • Meditating and tracking your emotions

These will leave you at your strongest in the middle/after a breakup.

You can also use a healthy habit tracker if you want a way to stay accountable! Some of the best ones include Way of Life, Streaks, and Loop. Here, you can stay on top of everything from water you drink to daily chores or walking the dog.

Distract Yourself With Friends

5. Distract Yourself With Friends

Unsplash, Priscilla Du Preez

There is scientific evidence that distractions can help you get over a breakup. Heartbreak is harder to feel if you’re surrounded by people pulling you in a different direction. It allows your brain and body to relax, giving you the strength to work through the hardest of times. Having people to lean on can make the biggest difference in the middle of turmoil!

Friends can pull you through anything. Best friends will stick right by your side, through thick and thin. Turning to your besties is the ultimate form of self-love during a split! You guys can enjoy a fun movie, explore an exciting city, or go shopping and buy something you’ve always wanted. 

Know This Process Is Not Easy

6. Know This Process is Not Easy

Unsplash, Jackson David

It’s no secret - breaking up is hard, both on the inside and the outside. Every person who has gone through a breakup can tell you that this process isn’t easy. Despite this fact, it’s critical to know that it WILL be okay. You’ll go through the ups and downs, but you’ll come out stronger on the other side. Self-love is accepting that it will take time to recover.

Some of the common emotions you might feel during a breakup include:

  • Longing for what used to be 
  • Anger at the events that unfolded, or the other person
  • Exhaustion at the emotional pain you’re experiencing
  • Confusion at the why, what, hows
  • Anxiety at what the future holds now that you’re single

It’s normal to cycle through these, and the speed varies for every person.

These might surface by themselves, or they may occur from an outside force. You might see something you both used to love, or you might see them on the street. Love yourself by embracing the emotion that comes with this trigger and letting it flow past. Remember - it will be okay, no matter how difficult it seems. Give it time.

Find A Positive In The Negative

7. Find a Positive in the Negative

Unsplash, Peter Conlan

It's scientifically proven that focusing on the positive can be a coping strategy. Keeping track of all the good aspects of life reminds you of all the other reasons to be happy! Positivity will always outweigh negativity when it comes to your future.

You can look for some positives in a breakup in:

  • The memories you share with the person, both the good and the bad
  • The benefits that will come from being on your own for the future
  • The ways you learned and grew from the relationship
  • The lessons you can take into the rest of your life
  • The time you have to work on things you love and want

There’s so much good to search for, even if they seem like negatives at first glance.

Loving yourself can make you stronger. Then, you can face the reality of the breakup, and it can help you grow for future relationships. Be kind to yourself and look for the positives. 

To Conclude

Was this article helpful? Do you feel more confident about loving yourself during a breakup? It's critical to take care of yourself during a split with someone you love. We'd love to hear what you think, too! Have any more tips or stories? Drop them in the comments below.